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Chumming…..

June 30, 2013

not as far fetched as it sounds….?

Most people have heard of “chumming”, especially if they have an affinity for deep sea fishing. For those who prefer their feet solidly planted on Terra Firma, “chumming” is when you periodically toss a bunch of gory fish scraps overboard to attract the LIVE fish you hope to catch by lulling them into believing none of the gourmet fare raining down on them has a hook in it. And, of course, they’re wrong.

I was reading an article about the fast approaching launch of “Obamacare” when people nationwide will jump on line to register, window shop the government subsidized insurance yard sales, and to see if they qualify for grants to pay the tab. Not surprisingly, most of those setting the systems up anticipate glitches and crashes.

Not to bring up that tired “I coulda had a V-8” shtick again, but “I coulda had a V-8”. Government can’t count to ten by fives without screwing something up, and this one was a given the very second it was passed into law. The President’s frantic dash to accomplish his Health Care Merit Badge by getting the “Affordable Care Act” through Congress before his sock drawer was all set up at the White House, with the obvious caveat that the whole gargantuan crazyplan has to be up and running before someone else gets to put their socks in that drawer after the 2016 election, created a guaranteed cluster-thingie. The clever part of such a brash move, this being a political dog and pony show, is that Obama gets the credit and the next guy gets to clean it up. Obama never has to do his stint as the man behind the elephant. That’s his forte, after all.

So, in October a majority of the adult population of the United States is going log on all at once, choruses of IT people from coast to coast will be singing “Servers roasting on an open fire…”, and Obama will admire his reflection in mirrors. All mirrors.

But I digress. I began by talking about “chumming”. The truth is, I wasn’t digressing at all. I was just taking in the panorama instead of staring blankly at the cheap lithograph laid out before me. Nice try.

I was going over some notes to try once again to make some sort of sense out of the Monty Python skit being put on by the NSA and their dupe Edward Snowden, and the broad spectrum of online assessments by everyone from professional pundits and alleged experts to troubled adolescents with Smartphones. You have your fist-shakers in the “My-Country-Right-or-Wrong” corner, the camo-clad survivalists in another, the kids whose greatest contribution to society thus far has been to do a passable job cleaning the bathrooms at Juvie, and a vigorous presence of “Conspiracy Theorists”.

That’s when I thought of “chumming”. Of course! It’s all part of the “Assimilation of America” movement, with data mining techniques and various other gear all being rolled out and tested. “Chumming”. But those who would like to have everybody’s dossier in hand don’t like to leave anything to chance. Obamacare was a bold move to not only bring all the fish to the boat, but to order them to eat.

You can see the hooks glinting in the sunlight.

All of the government data banks will be updated, spell-checked, and locked in through the verification and identification process of all the good fish obediently rushing to the boat to lap up the mandated healthcare.

“Chumming”.

 

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