It takes a village…..

May 7, 2014

to hide its idiots….

The appearance of chronic acute OCD at the Federal level is just that…. appearance, albeit a rather convincing one. Focused study and pondering over the past few years has revealed the real issue, the thing driving the apparent compulsion to micromanage American, nay, global goings-on at the quantum level. The culprit is job creation. It takes a village to move a paper clip from one side of a room to the other, you know:

paper clips1

Amazing, isn’t it? Why, all I needed in sixth grade to “transport” a paper clip from one side of the room to the other was a good rubber band.

Of course, my prime objective was to wing Billy Davis’ left ear without nailing the teacher in the stern sheets on the rebound. In other words, I wanted to get the paperclip to the destination without getting caught.

The village philosophy of Standard Fastener Mobility’s mission, on the other hand, is to utilize as many people as possible to get a specific paperclip from Point A to Billy’s ear, pay them generously for their service (hence making them ineligible for unemployment benefits) thereby validating claims to an improved economy and a drop in unemployment. Naturally, if things don’t go quite according to plan, which is often the case, contingency plans are in place to ensure that should the teacher’s bum experience an unfortunate event involving a wayward paperclip, Billy Davis will be seriously implicated and hung out to dry.


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